Body Image: Do we love our bodies?
In February, Silver & Grace community members had an opportunity to complete a body image survey. The response was overwhelming. If you haven’t already read the introductory post, you can do so here.
Today’s post analyses the following survey question:
What is your gut reaction to this question – “Do you love your body?” Yes? or No?
I have to say, ladies, we are awfully hard on ourselves. 60% of the respondents said “no, they do not love their bodies”. As for the gentlemen respondents? 50% do not love their bodies, so they are equally as hard on themselves as we are.
I wasn’t willing to leave the numbers at that, so I drilled it down into age groups. I conjectured that perhaps the younger women love their bodies, and as we get older our love tapers off as our bodies age. Here is what I found:
- Under 40 years – 30% love their bodies
- 40 – 49 years – 45% love their bodies
- 50 – 59 years – 35% love their bodies
- 60 – 69 years – 60% love their bodies
- Over 70 years – 60% love their bodies
Turns out my hypothesis was wrong! It’s the older gals who love their bodies, not the younger ones.
My response to this survey question is “yes, I love my body”. I think the best way to describe my relationship to my body is similar to my relationship with my children as they were growing up. I loved them all the time, but there sure were times I did not like their behaviours.
I love my body. It’s strong and it’s flexible. It gets me places either at a walk or a run. It gives pleasure and receives pleasure.
But there sure are days I don’t like its behaviour. Like when it bloats up. Or develops red itchy rosacea. Or sends a shooting pain down my left hip.
These behaviours are always temporary conditions, so while I might get grumpy because at a particular moment I might not look or feel my best, I don’t dwell on it. It’s a case of this too shall pass. I know the foundation is strong.
This could explain why the majority of the older gals love their bodies. They have to come to accept the quirky behaviours of their bodies, and focus on loving what their bodies have accomplished over a lifetime.
But what of the under 40 crowd? In theory their bodies should be strong while undesirable behaviours should be few and far between. Or at this age, are they focusing more on what their bodies look like as opposed to what their bodies can do?
I also found it interesting that there was a dip in body love in the 50 to 59 crowd, then the love nearly doubles for the over 60 crowd. I think it is fairly safe to say that this is due to all the not so lovely changes associated with menopause in our fifties.
Going back to my parent and child analogy, it’s like having to deal with an extremely troublesome teenager. Menopause causes your body to act out and tests the outermost limits of your love. Then your teenager moves into her twenties, and its all so easy again. In your sixties, your body settles down and you can once again focus on what it can do, as opposed to what it cannot.
Well, all this analysis is one woman’s thoughts and opinions. I would love to hear how you interpret the results based on your own experiences. There are no right or wrong answers, so have fun with it.
And make sure you come back for the rest of the survey results. Here is the schedule:
March 31 – Are we willing to go under the knife?
April 7 – Are we sexy?
April 14 – How do we view our body parts?
April 21 – Who do we compare ourselves to?
April 28 – Are we satisfied with our weight?
May 5 – Are we looking forward to aging?
Don’t miss out!
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This is interesting! I too am surprised by the dip in the numbers for the 50-year-olds, but what you’ve noted about menopause makes sense. Actually, I feel like celebrating because it’s been over 3 months since my last cycle and I turn 46 in 2 weeks. It’s a little disconcerting to notice changes that you can’t do anything about. I’m pretty happy with my physique though. I still have my health and I’m thankful for that. Have to remind myself to not take it for granted.
@Davina – I’m a year older than you and my cycle is still regular as clockwork. I definitely like my body. However, in the last several weeks, I’m not so pleased about emotional state. Life is absolutely wonderful and all I want to do is cry all the time. It’s ridiculous!
Interesting. I have fibromyalgia and back issues so it often depends on the level of pain I am in on how much love I am feeling for my body.
Yet despite pain management issues, I am happy enough with the way my body looks. I came to terms with the fact that no one was coming calling to put me on the cover of Glamour magazine a long time ago. ( besides, I’m short) so I am more focused on being strong and healthy then being someone’s idea of a pin up girl.
The whole body/mind/emotional roller coaster in my 50th year is something I’ve just have to shake my head at. What I see in the mirror changes based on my mood. Errg. Arrg.
@Wendi – yes, chronic pain would certainly put a damper on body love. As for pin up girl looks, I think they are highly over rated. And actually, that ties in nicely with the survey question “Who do we compare ourselves to?” coming soon.
@Lori – oh totally. Somedays I look in the mirror and do some definite ERRGing and ARRGing. I have rosacea which is very difficult to keep under control when I am running, because flushing of the face causes flare ups. So there were days I would feel downright ugly. But this time around I decided I love running and that outweighs a red blotchy face. For fancier occasions I use cover up make up. The rest of the time, I look pass the rash to sparkling eyes and a broad smile.
At 23 years old, I don’t love my body. But I also don’t hate my body… it’s just that I don’t ever look in the mirror, or walk down stairs (ugh) and think, “Gosh, I’ve got a great body!” I’ve accepted it as MY body, and there are definitely things I’d like to change, though for the most part those changes would be for the sake of good health: better legs so I can run without worrying I’ll pull a muscle or my knees will go out (yes, it’s pathetic that I have those problems at age 23, but with all my years of dancing I’ve had quite a few injuries), stronger core muscles so I don’t risk injuring myself more, so on and so forth.
Yeah, some of those would have the side-effect of looking nicer (nicer legs, nicer abs, etc.) but that’s really not the goal. The issues I have with my body that bother me the most are with how my body works (although, of course, there are things that I’m not so fond if in terms of appearance. But most of those – broken nose, wide hips, etc. are not things that I have much control over changing.) For the most part, I like my body. I just wish it would work the way it’s supposed to.
@Allison – your body not working is an interesting point. It’s like Wendi’s comment about having fibromyalgia. When your mind is at odds with your body then it’s certainly hard to love you your body. What I find really interesting is that as a dancer, I was expecting you to say you love your body. As in, being in tune with it. But professional dancing is a sport, and as such our bodies get pushed to extremes in sports and start to rebel. Huh, now you’ve got me wondering how athletes view their bodies as they age. …interesting.
Eliza – As a dancer, I’m very much in tune with my body, more so than a lot of other people that I know. But I suppose this also makes me a lot more aware of when things just aren’t working quite right, even just a little bit. Along those same lines, as a dancer there’s a certain level of fitness that I need to have. So when I don’t – either from injuries, or being even a little out of shape, or just plain because that’s how my body was made – then it’s frustrating.
That being said, I do like my body, most of the time. When it works the way it’s supposed to.
@Allison – yes, I was putting more thought to this and decided I would be more demanding of my body as an athlete. Makes sense.
I found this incredibly interesting. Like you, Eliza, I would have never expected this to be the case. However, I do have a theory as to why younger women tend to love their bodies less than older women.
In the world we live in, a huge indicator of a woman’s worth is her body. This is especially true for young women who are expected to get married and start a family. I think the enormous pressure on young women to be sexy all of the time is what causes them to be hypersensitive about their physical appearance.
As women get older, the pressure to be physically attractive lessens, and women have more room to enjoy their bodies for what they really are.
Just like most artists who seem overly critical of their work, women tend to dislike their appearance if they see it as something that needs to be “worked on.” Instead, they should realize that 99% of women are just as (if not more) attractive as they ever need to be without any effort.
Really interesting discovery. Keep up the good work!
-Saint
@Street Saint – hey, thanks for joining in the dialogue. Very good critique. I wonder if the pressure to be physically attractive does lessen as we age. From my perspective, yes it does. But what about colouring our hair? Going to tanning beds? Hours in the gym? Boob jobs, tummy tucks, botox …. Not to mention clothing that is way too young for us … don’t get me started on that one!
This is interesting: In the world we live in, a huge indicator of a woman’s worth is her body So true. But ask a man what makes an ‘older woman’ sexy and he will invariably say ‘confidence’. So, the shift is away from the external package to the entire package.
Hmmm … more food for thought, eh?