I am sure you have heard, or even said yourself, “Oh my, if this is what she is like now, imagine when she is old!” This always seems to be said in a Saints Preserve Us sort of way. But, is becoming more you as you get older really a bad thing?
Okay, backing up to a conversation I had with Hubby this weekend. He said I came across as reserved and cold when I first meet people, and even after I warm up to them, I do not go out of my way to chat people up. He was not critisizing; he was stating his observations. I was still taken aback, as I am fully aware of what goes on around me and know exactly what’s what with the people in my life, and quite enjoy meeting new people.
Knowing I am an introvert, I looked up the traits to see if I could gain some insight into why he perceived me this way. Holy crumpets! I met every single introvert trait to the max. I do mean every single trait. You can’t find someone more introverted than me. I am so introverted I am surprised I am not turned completely inside out! Skin on the inside, guts on the outside. Sorry, a little visual digression.
This explains Hubby’s perception of me, because he is an extrovert so cannot comprehend my inner thought processes and modus operandi. I sent him the list and said “Yo, Hubby, this is me!”
But, here is the thing. I shocked myself at how introverted I am. I wasn’t always like this. From age twenty to forty, I pushed myself to be more extroverted. I made small talk. I tried to get to know as many people as I could. I attended parties and large events.
And I was freakin’ exhausted. All the time. This type of stuff revs up an extrovert, but it sucks the life out of an introvert.
So, I cut back. I didn’t stop those behaviours entirely, that would not be healthy, but I cut back to a point where I can keep my energy balanced.
I figure at darn near fifty, I am allowed to be much more me. And, since that means I am full of energy and very happy, that can only be a good thing.
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